Monday, June 30, 2008
Wet Umbrellas
Courtney Love has the life I want.
When I was 8 years old, my cousin Hank and I stole a shopping cart from Pioneer supermarket and took it back to our house. I got in the cart, cuz if we stood any chance at getting away with that crime I could not be on my feet - that, and I was the only bandit to resemble a frozen turkey. My point is, I definitely did not look as glamorous or eloquent as C. Love. I mean, I didn't even have a cigarette between my toes.
When I was 8 years old, my cousin Hank and I stole a shopping cart from Pioneer supermarket and took it back to our house. I got in the cart, cuz if we stood any chance at getting away with that crime I could not be on my feet - that, and I was the only bandit to resemble a frozen turkey. My point is, I definitely did not look as glamorous or eloquent as C. Love. I mean, I didn't even have a cigarette between my toes.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Black Barbie Dressed in Bulgari
I am legally obligated to not tell you where I work. But if curiosity gets the best of you, you can ask my friend Mona [mona.chaudhuri@gmail.com].
Inspiration: Crotchless Sundresses
One of my best friends of all time, and all-around hot bitch, Liz Hall has gotten back to blogging. You may know Liz from the trillion posts I've done on her. Liz and I are both sporadic bloggers and very recently she's gotten back into the swing of things. Now I have no problem admitting that I ride on her coattail - and this is not a reference to her dressing in men's clothing. What I'm saying is, Liz has influenced my life in many ways. Let's take a deeper look (twss):
1) duct tape - it was the winter of '05 and liz broke out linen pants. after growing tired of dragging her summer gear through brown snow, she ripped off two squares of duct tape to create a quick hem. i immediately bought a roll of duct tape and shoved it in my pants to look like i have a bigger dick.
next.
2) chuck taylors - spring of '05. liz purchases gray chucks and one yellow raincoat. i immediately go out and purchase "under the tuscan sun" and a pair in burgundy.
keep it comin.
3) vodka - june '81 to present. liz drinks said vodka with gatorade. i take vodka bottle and shove it in my pants to look like i have a bigger dick. it's mistaken for a gargantuan clit.
lady marmalade.
1) duct tape - it was the winter of '05 and liz broke out linen pants. after growing tired of dragging her summer gear through brown snow, she ripped off two squares of duct tape to create a quick hem. i immediately bought a roll of duct tape and shoved it in my pants to look like i have a bigger dick.
next.
2) chuck taylors - spring of '05. liz purchases gray chucks and one yellow raincoat. i immediately go out and purchase "under the tuscan sun" and a pair in burgundy.
keep it comin.
3) vodka - june '81 to present. liz drinks said vodka with gatorade. i take vodka bottle and shove it in my pants to look like i have a bigger dick. it's mistaken for a gargantuan clit.
lady marmalade.
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